Coffee, Tea or Five Card Draw

Chances are 1 in 649,740 you'll get this hand. 

I arrived in Panhandle in the early morning. The fall harvest was coming up and I had a trunkful of farm equipment catalogs to distribute to my customers. I wanted them read my materials over the winter. There would be no sales pitches on this trip, just stop in, say hello, talk about the weather, give out the catalogs.

I was interested in listening to the ranchers talk about their upcoming plans, of course, but I also wanted to know what happened at the poker tournament that pitted Jackie’s Women Only Club against the men of Panhandle. All I knew was that the women had challenged the men to a charity benefit poker tournament a month before. The players would put up a $25 stake. That came to $600. Some businesses ponied up to fatten the pot. The money was for repairs on the library bus that made regular rounds to ranches and farms bringing books and magazines to the kids and adults who couldn’t make it into town on their own. I know in some places the only book in the house is a Bible.

As I drove by Jackie’s Cold Day Inn I saw her sweeping the sidewalk. I decided to stop and chat. It was too early for my usual Jack so we had coffee instead and took a table near the coffee pot. Wendy poured out three cups and joined us.

Jackie dropped sugar cube in her cup, took a sip, and said, “We won.”

“The women won?” Both Jackie and Wendy rewarded me with radiant smiles

Jackie leaned back in her seat and said, “Yeah, we did. We got all the money, $1,845. The bus is gettin’ a new engine, transmission, and two new tires. There was 70 or more of us, drinkin’, havin’ fun, givin’ free advice to the players. There’s a few couples  who won’t be gettin’ along for a while but nothin’ too serious.

“Sheriff Tom laid out the rules --- anybody not havin’ a good time hasta leave or stand in the corner facing the wall. Doc and Wendy were in charge of knowin’ the rules of Five Card Draw in case there was any disagreements. We’re feelin’ pretty good about the turnout and the money.

“There was some side betting going on mostly on which man would come out on top... Steve. A few of  ‘em thought Jackie had the best chance among the women.

I raised my hand like a cop saying stop. “Isn’t betting illegal in this county?”

“Well, lemme put it this way. There was a man who looked like Tom, wearin’ jeans, a snap button shirt and shiny boots. You could ask around, I ‘spose, but nobody remembers seein’ the Sheriff in the bar.”

She winked at me, “More coffee?” and continued.

“We had twelve on each side. At first, the men played it for laughs but then they noticed that we were winnin’. Willis was the first to lose his stake. Then Lonny was done. A couple of hours later it was three men against five women. The men got more serious but it didn’t help much. They were still losin’. On our side, Millie was the first woman to drop out. Flora lost tryin’ to buy the pot. She stopped payin’ attention for a minute and Steve took her down with Jacks over 8’s, smug look on his face. I was hopin’ she’d last longer. She’s a smart one.

“It evened up some, three on three now. Mike, Don, and Steve on one side. Me, Becky, (we call her the church lady), and Doris on the other. I made a dumbass play, holding on to two pair, low number cards, and bettin’ too much, and lost. Doris hung on but didn’t have enough chips to stay in. So she was gone along with Don. Then Becky played Mike like a two dollar fiddle and he went down. She was so still the whole time, made me think of a five foot tall volcano, a little smoke rising, might blow up anytime.

“It was one helluva finish. It was down to Becky and Steve playin’ the last hand, all the money was on the table, $1845. Winner take all. We all got real quiet, even Chatty Cathy. Steve made a big show of layin’ his cards facedown on the table while Becky held her cards close, almost touchin’ her nose. Swear to god I heard the music from one of them Clint Eastwood westerns, a showdown in the middle of Main street.

“Steve turned his cards over one at a time, a big ole GOTCHA smirk on his face.  A sure winner, three Queens, Ace high. His buds come up, slap ‘im on the back. Everybody in the bar knew that ‘trips’ of anything’s hard to get, hard to beat. The women groaned and the men whooped. Sweet, sweet victory.

“But it wasn’t over. Becky flipped her cards on the table like a riverboat gambler, real slow, one at a time. King of Hearts... King of Spades... Seven of Hearts. I thought her next card would pair up with the Seven of Hearts. Two pair don’t beat three of a kind --- huge mistake! But then she flipped the King of Diamonds. Steve looked like Becky’d just walloped him upside his head with her purse. You know, I think he mighta liked that better. For a minute it looked like he was gonna turn the table over, he was so mad. He saw all of us women coming up behind Becky and he changed his mind and sat down, glared at his three Queens.”

I told Jackie it sounded crazy when she proposed the tournament. Men against women in a poker game for a year of bragging rights. The men were practiced poker players after all, playing against each other for years. And the women?

“Tell you the truth, Jackie, I didn’t think they’d be too interested in playing poker.”

Jackie agreed, nodding slowly. “Well, when I told ‘em my idea they didn’t like it one bit. To them, poker meant smelly cigars and stale beer stinkin’ up the house, same old raunchy jokes, late nights. And who’s gotta clean up after they’re gone --- the women!

“I begged ‘em to try it just the once. Play for pennies, I said, I’ll put up the stakes. Lo and behold, some of them started gettin’ the hang of it. From then on it was all “check”, “call”, “raise”. It helped that me and Wendy served up a lotta free wine. When the meetin’ was over I told ‘em the first trainin’ class was the next night. I had a full house.

“I figured I could teach the women some basics, like rankin' winnin' hands, good hand, bad hand, when to fold and the like. Honest, I wasn’t expectin' to win. It takes skill, a lotta practice, a damn good memory and a powerful desire to win. I had less than a month  to get the women ready so I didn’t put much into it at first. The tournament wasn’t about winnin' anyway. It was a stunt for gettin' up enough money to fix the damn library bus.

“Most of the men I asked said no or kinda laughed at the idea of playin' against women even if it was for charity. ‘Embarrassin', one ‘em said, ‘for the women’.

“I was gettin’ discouraged until I remembered something Doc Harris told me once. He said if you wanna hurt a woman, attack her looks. If you wanna hurt a man attack his pride. So I went after the men with this: You won’t play against us ‘cause you’re afraid to lose. That riled ‘em up but good.”

“Becky, the church lady surprised me. It wasn’t long ago she wouldn’t even touch a deck of cards, let alone gamble, Devil’s Workshop, Road to Hell and all that. But this was for charity like Bingo so her minister said it was ok. Anyhow, she jumped into it with both feet, takin’ notes while the other women described the ‘tells’ they knew from a lifetime of watchin’ their men. Stuff like his left eye twitches when he’s fibbin’. Squints like Clint Eastwood when he wants to look tough, rolls his shoulders, and so on. Peggy over the library told me Becky checked out some books on poker.

Wendy refilled my cup and said, “Jackie, don’t forget about Steve.”

“Oh, yeah, Steve. I ran into him at Les’s store one afternoon. We were talkin' about the tourney. You know Steve, how cocky he acts. He says, ‘I’m guessin' it won’t take 15, 20 minutes and it’ll be over.’”

Jackie clenched her fists and took a deep breath.

“Then the sumbitch really torqued my jaws. He says, ‘Jackie, I’m a pretty fair poker player and I might be goin’ against my kind but I’ll tell you what I can do. I’m willin’ to help you gals out by teachin’ your ladies how to play winnin’ poker, make the tournament more interestin’ and last a little longer.

“He gives me his shit eatin’ grin like he’s already won, and all’s left is which of the men will be top dog and he’s sure it’s gonna be him. I smiled at him and said you’re probly right about who wins but it’ll be fun and that old bus gets a new engine out of it. Let me think on it, let you know.

“I’ll tell you what, inside I was pissed to a fare thee well but I didn’t show it. What I was thinkin’ right then was when we get that old bus fixed the front bumper is gonna be the last thing he sees before he leaves this life for the next one.

“I was still steamed when I got back to the bar. Wendy says what’s wrong and I tell her what Steve said. I was mad all afternoon and Wendy stayed out of my way. We finished gettin' the bar ready for the early customers and settled down for some wine.

“I’m sittin' there sippin' my wine and gettin' mad about Steve all over again. Wendy says Steve’s pretty sure of himself. I said yeah, he’s been that way since we were in high school a hundred years ago. All the girls thought he was hot stuff, jealous of me because he was my steady. Except for the thinnin' hair and the beer belly he’s still the same know-it-all asshole.”

Wendy leaned over and put her hand on my arm and said, “I told Jackie about when Milo was teaching me self defense he said when your opponent is bigger and stronger than you, what you do is turn his size and strength against him. Use his power to beat him. Milo’s got 40 pounds on me but I flipped ‘im on his back just like he showed me.”

Jackie said, “What Wendy said gave me an idea. Men are bigger and louder than most women and they got a lotta experience playin’ cards. What if we used that to figure out their moves in the poker game?

“Once we had the basics of Five Card Draw I spent the last two weeks teachin’ the women about ‘tells’ and not worry about their hand so much. And we saw it work at the tournament when Becky bluffed Mike but good. He showed his hand, winkin' or makin' faces at his friends. Becky showed nothin'. Just kept uppin' the bet. He’s keepin' up bettin' and raisin' so damn sure he can beat the little old church lady clutchin' her cards so hard her knuckles look like they’re gonna bust out the skin. She keeps raisin' the bet ‘til Mike’s outa chips and has to fold. Found out later he had a pair of 10’s, Queen high. Wanna know what Becky had? Becky had nothin', not a pair, not even part of an inside straight, nothin' at all.”

Wendy slapped the table and laughed, “You shoulda seen what Becky’s face the whole time she’s playin’ him. It was like one of those giant statues you see on TV, a bunch of ‘em look alike, nobody knows who made ‘em. Easter Island.

Jackie sighed and stared into her coffee cup. “Goes to show you. If anybody knows how to hide what they’re thinkin’ or feelin’ when it counts, it’s women. That’s how women my age were brought up. Men grow up different --- they don’t have to hide it when they’re pissed off, disgusted, or anything. Women, we’re supposed to say sorry even when we’re right, saves some of us from gettin’ beat up. No way it’s right but that’s the way it’s been as far back as I know.”

I saw Wendy’s face harden. She’s from a younger generation and times are changing too slowly for her.

“Like I said, in my day women  were raised different from men. Think about it a minute. From the very beginnin' boys are put outdoors like livestock to butt heads with each other like billy goats. They hafta yell and holler above the noise from cattle, tractors, threshers, and each other. Their life is loud sunrise to sunrise. Boys become men all their lives hearin’ and usin’ their outside voices.

“Most women are raised indoors. They learn the quiet ways of cooking, sewing, cleaning, raisin' babies, all the time hearing inside voices. Wendy here’s got it better but there’s still a long way to go.”

The phone rang and Wendy went to answer it. Jackie and I sipped our coffee while we waited for her to come back.

“That was Doc Harris. Wanted to know if we were here. He’s on his way over.”

A few minutes later Doc Harris came in and took the chair next to me. “Mornin’ all. Wendy, you got some coffee for me? What’s good, Jackie?”

“Oh, not much, Doc, just tellin’ our friend here about the poker tournament.”

Doc Harris stirred two sugar cubes into his coffee, drank half of it, looked at me and said,

“Everybody had a great time, even the losin’ side. You look at it seriously, though, there’s no way the women win. They been playin' a couple of weeks against men who learned poker in the Army, at weekly poker games and such. Hell, even the worst players know enough to fold or hold even if they lose most of the time. No, sir. No way the women  win. What nobody counted on was Jackie’s smarts.”

Jackie pursed her lips and shook her head side to side. “Doc, you’re thinkin’ too much. It don’t take a lotta smarts to figure out what we did. Poker’s a game of strategy and deception. We had both, their side was every man for himself.

“Number one: All of ‘em think they’re great poker players, playin’ against each other. You don’t improve playin’ against the same five men. You get better goin’ against players better’n you, learn what you gotta do to win.

“Number two: The women know their men better’n they know themselves. We learned their tells. We hid ours as best we could. I heard some folks say they beat themselves. Nope. We beat ‘em fair and square.”

Doc stroked his chin and was about to say something but Jackie interrupted, “See? That’s your tell when you’re gonna say you think I’m right.”

He stared at her for a long second and put his hand down. “Yeah, I was gonna say that. Then I was gonna tell you I called Tom and Les. They’ll be here in a minute. They’re at Milo’s picking up the banner.”

Turning to Jackie I said, “Banner?”

Jackie said, “Hold on, Doc. I was savin’ this for last. I really like tellin’ it.” Wendy went to the bar and came back with four shots of bourbon.

“The day before the tournament, we’re gettin’ the bar ready, settin’ up the tables. We’re busy. Steve comes in and says he thinks we oughta commemorate the tournament, make it an annual thing. How ‘bout the losing side has to put a banner over your bar sayin’ something like, ‘Panhandle, Where the Women Are Strong and the Best Poker Players Are Men.’ And it has to stay up until the next tournament.

“Hell, I just wanted him outa here so I said, sure, sure, why not, and forgot about it until we won.”

“Yep”, Doc said, “aside from losin’ braggin’ rights for a year the losin’ side has to pay for the banner. Tom, Les, and me are puttin’ it up this morning.”

“What does it say?”, I asked.

“Panhandle, Where the Men are Good Looking and the Best Poker Players are Women.”

Moonshine, horses, and tennis shoes

Old man Newman smiled at me without malice for the first time in the 15 years I’d been calling on him. And for the first time in 15 years he wasn’t cradling a rifle across his body while we talked. Instead, he reached out to hand me a jar of his homemade white lightning. I took the jar and looked over his shoulder at the rifle leaning against the barn.

He must have seen something in my eyes and asked for the jar back. He took it, unscrewed the lid, took a deep swallow and said, “I don’t give this stuff away to anybody. I’m ready to sign on to that John Deere you been itchin’ to sell me for 10 years.”

Newman is my hardest sell. Other ranchers and farmers on my Amarillo to Midland sales route can be difficult but it’s natural for them to hem, haw, and bargain for the best possible price. I get something, they get something, and a handshake closes the deal. With men like these a handshake means more than a formal contract. On the other hand, Newman is the kind of man who’s suspicious of everything including Kleenex boxes that offer up another tissue the instant you pull the top one out.

It was already close to sundown, the end of another day in the heat of early Spring. I drove into Panhandle and parked across the street from Jackie’s Cold Day Inn. I knew Sheriff Tom, Les, and Doc Harris would already be at their usual corner table.

I like Jackie’s bar. It’s the kind of place where orderliness is the exception. I would be alarmed if I walked in and found the tables and chairs arranged in a symmetrical pattern. The only things lined up in any order are the whiskey bottles and glasses along the back bar. Jackie’s Cold Day Inn looks lived in, and that’s the way the others and I like it.

My friends said Hi and invited me to sit with them. Jackie brought my Jack on the rocks, nodded at the jar of white lightning I’d set on the table. She squared her shoulders put her hands on her hips and snapped, “I’m supposed to think that’s water, right? In case you don’t know it, homemade hooch is illegal in this county. And in case you haven’t noticed the man sittin’ across from you, the one with the big star on his chest, gun on his hip, he’s the Sheriff sworn to uphold the laws of this land for the betterment of the community and to the detriment of those who break the law.”

I wasn’t expecting a lecture like that, especially from Jackie. She picked up the jar, opened it and took a sip and winked at me.

“Just coverin’ my ass in case ole Tom here decides to bust you. I got three witnesses heard me warn you.” I turned to the men and saw them smiling. Les shaped his hand like a gun and blew imaginary smoke from the barrel. Wendy giggled behind the bar. Panhandle's been on my sales route for over 15 years and I’m still that city slicker from Amarillo.

Tom reached for the jar and held it up to the light and shook it. “Clear as glass. A lot of moonshine’s cloudy from bad filterin’, give you a sour bellyache to go along with a three-day hangover. I’d say Newman took his time with this, all copper fittin’s, I’ll betcha, start to finish. Not much call for it these days except for Newman and the Crawford boys, holdouts to the last I guess.”

Clear as your conscience, pure as your heart

He shook the jar one more time and I asked why. “Watch the bubbles”, he said and shook it again. “Big bubbles that disappear fast means it’s high proof whiskey. Small bubbles that stick around means it’s low proof. This here is probly 120 proof or there ‘bouts, best for nippin’ while you work. You want the good shine, it’ll be clear with big bubbles, just like this one.

“That Jack in your glass is the same stuff, lower proof but before it got here it was ‘aged’ in oak barrels for a few years. That’s where the brown color, smokey flavor, and the high price tag come from. White lightin’, you can drink it as soon as your catchin’ jug is full. Cheap, too, compared to your Jack.”

Tom opened the jar, smelled it and said, “When I was growin’ up my daddy and Dale Newman were pretty good friends, fished and hunted together before and after they both retired. But it wasn’t always that way. Before I was born, my daddy, bein' the Sheriff, was on one side of the law. Dale was on the other side, makin’ and sellin’ moonshine. My daddy told me about it one day we were fishin’. Dale Newman was dead by then, left the ranch to his son.

“Maybe you noticed that ole Newman’s the only man I let carry a gun in town. Only me and my deputy carry guns. Everybody else leaves 'em at home or locked up in their trucks. I’ll get to why in a bit.

“Back in the day some counties were dry, some wet. This county was dry but you had to look hard to think the townsfolk were behind the idea. Newman’s daddy was busy havin’ his name written in a bunch of arrest records. Small stuff, usually. Drunk drivin’, disturbin’ the peace, minor assault charges, like that.”

Les shifted in his chair, stirred his drink with his finger and said, “Dale wasn’t a bad guy. Matter of fact he was famous for a while. He captured a bank robber down in Snyder in ’38 or ’39. You probly never heard of him. They called him Jesuit James because he dressed like a priest when he robbed small town banks, hit six of 'em before he got caught.

“Dale was just finished doin’ 30 days in the Snyder lockup for assault and feelin’ bad about his life. Repentance was on his mind when he saw the robber priest hustlin' down an alley and he thought it was a good time to confess his sins, get right with the Lord. But the robber started runnin' and dropped his gun. Dale tackled 'im, saved the day.

“After that he settled down some, raised a few head of cattle and hogs. Dale was a pretty decent rancher but he had a coupla bad years, couldn’t pay off his bank loans. So he looked around for ways to make some cash. He had a still in his barn and started sellin’ the lightnin’ but wasn’t makin’ enough money so he built a bigger still. Wasn't long before Tom’s daddy discovered it, took an axe to it, put him out of business.”

Wendy brought clean ashtrays and a bowl of pretzels. Doc Harris took a handful. Between crunches he said, “Next thing he did was build a still up in the hills, away from roads and cattle trails where nobody’s lookin’. Workin’ day and night Dale put the still together and got busy makin’ his first batch. Anyway, he was dog-tired, dozed off, and the still got too hot, exploded. The pieces were scattered all over god’s half acre and lucky for Dale, if you can call him lucky at this point, sleepin' behind some rocks saved his life. One thing, though, some boilin' mash splashed on his butt, burned through his pants and gave him an embarrassin' burn.

“A cowboy roundin’ up strays a mile or two away heard the explosion, saw the smoke risin’ in the sky. He found Dale tryin’ to pour water on his behind, cool it down. There wasn’t anything Dale or the cowboy could do about the burn which wasn’t too deep but it still hurt like devil. Best thing was to get him into town, see a doctor.

“It was quite a sight for the townsfolk not used to too much excitement about anything in those days. They turned out to watch the cowboy ride in, leadin’ a pack mule with Dale strapped across it like a trophy buck, arms hangin’ down one side, legs down the other, butt in the air. Some said they saw smoke risin’ off his behind. I don’t know as that’s true. Sometimes folks just make things up.

“The bank let him slide on his loan while he healed up but let him know that the clock was tickin’ steady. He knows the only way to make money was moonshine so he tried some more. This time he had his boy helping, teachin' him the trade, I guess. The kid was 12 years old, probly.”

Doc Harris paused and looked at the ceiling and said, “Anybody here know ole Newman’s first name?”

Tom said, “It’s Lynn, Lynn Newman. Nowadays it’s a girl’s name but my daddy told me that in the 1920’s, 30’s Lynn for a boy wasn’t unusual. Besides it was a Newman family name from Scotland or England, some place like that, goin’ back a hundred years maybe more.”

“Yeah, Lynn,” Doc said, “how could I forget that? Anyhow, Dale and his boy, Lynn, got the new still set up and workin’, this time watchin’ the temperature. One of 'em would mind  the still while the other stood watch high up on the rocks in case the Sheriff or anybody else come snoopin’.

Doc nodded at Tom, "You tell it, you know it best."

“My daddy and Dale played cat and mouse for months. Dale kept movin’ the still, one step ahead until my daddy caught him and his boy dead to rights in the hills near Comanche Springs.

12 Pack for the weekend

“Dale saw my daddy and dropped his gun, went down on his knees like his insides went all soft, started cryin’. His boy tried to get near but Dale pushed him away, ashamed to let his boy see him cryin’. Lynn was cryin’, too, seeing his father humiliated like that, givin’ up without a fight.

“The boy turned his gun on my daddy.

“‘Boy! Dale shouted. Put it down.’

“Of course, daddy arrested Dale and sent the boy to his aunt in Pampa. Judge Thompkins set bail at $25. Dale was a real proud man and it was a real puzzle to see him cryin’ like he did. Any man, includin’ me, would soon blow his brains out than cry in front of his son.”

Tom put both hands on his drink and stared into it for a moment.

“It wasn’t ‘til later that I found out why.

“What happened was, about four months before I arrested Dale, the banker, Sid Murphy, showed up at the ranch with foreclosure papers in hand. Dale said gimme another 30 days, I can sell the lightnin’ in my barn and have your money.

“Now, Murphy didn’t get rich by showin’ mercy, I can tell you. He looked over Dale’s inventory of shine and knew right away he could get double that sellin’ it himself over in Hudspeth County. Greedy people don’t think for a minute about lettin’ the other fella win a little. No, sir, all money is theirs, all the time. Blood suckers like Murphy win by makin’ the other fella lose everything.

“He says to Dale, ‘Here’s how it’s gonna be. You sell me the shine for half what you get now. That discount goes to your mortgage. And you only sell to me. I hear you’re goin’ behind my back, I’ll just hafta let the Sheriff know what you’re up to, you go to jail, lose your ranch, probly lose your boy, too. Deal? Deal? Come on now, say it. Deal. Say it.’

“Dale hangs his head and says deal."

Tom clenched his fist and rasped, “Lynn’s next to his daddy hearin’ the banker, hatin’ him like poison, thinkin’ they could shoot ‘im, feed him to the hogs, nobody’d ever know.”

All of us suddenly decided we needed another sip of whiskey. Tom relaxed, leaned back in his chair and lit a cigarillo.

“Dale kept makin’ the lightnin’, givin’ it to Murphy like he said. Then he made a special batch to get a better price.

“He and the boy went to Murphy’s private office and waited while Murphy puffed his cigar, ignorin’ them, pretendin' to read the papers on his desk.

“Tired of waitin’, Dale said, ‘Mr. Murphy, here’s a sample of shine I just run off my still. 160 proof, best yet. I’m figurin’ you can give me a better price. Here, have a taste, tell me I’m wrong.’

“Murphy looked up, patted the papers on the desk and said, ‘This here’s your mortgage contract and the payment schedule. Sorry, Dale but the numbers ain’t workin’ out. The only way you’re gonna pay it off is by droppin’ your price some more from now on.’

“Dale jumped out of his chair, bumped the desk and spilled the lightnin’ on the desk. Murphy tried to save the papers, forgettin’ the cigar in his hand. The moonshine, 80% alcohol mind you, flashed, set the papers and the desk on fire. They put it out but the desk was scorched bad. Murphy yelled, ‘Get out! Don’t come back ‘less I tell you to.’

“That was two weeks before my daddy busted Dale’s still for the last time. But he couldn’t stop thinkin’ about Lynn and how the boy looked seein’ his father down on his knees, cryin', beaten down, hopeless.”

Tom paused and stubbed out his cigarillo while Wendy replaced the empty glasses with fresh drinks.

“Daddy drove to Pampa where the boy was stayin’ with his aunt. He wasn’t sure what he was gonna do or say to the kid, the one who woulda shot ‘im except his daddy said don’t.

“When he got to the house he took off his gun belt and his badge, put them in the cruiser. The boy was sittin’ on the steps on the porch.

“He told the boy he came by to tell him his daddy was ok. Not in jail or anything like that but maybe he would be later on because moonshinin’ was against the law just like shootin’ a man. He could tell the boy was hatin’ on ‘im like he was the day he arrested his father.

“He sat next to the boy not sayin’ anything. Then the boy said, ‘You ever shoot anybody?’ My daddy told him no, never saw a need to. My job is to keep people safe. When a crime is committed, I find out who did it and catch the bad guy. I carry a gun just in case I might need to shoot rattlers. Do you think your daddy broke the law?

“The boy said yeah but it wasn’t his fault. The banker made him do it.”

Sheriff Tom paused, looked at each of us sitting around the table to let that sink in. He took a long pull on his drink and said, “One thing about interviewin’ kids is they’ll tell you everything they know then they shut up.

“My daddy says to Lynn, how did the banker make your daddy break the law? The boy told the story about the banker forcin’ Dale to sell him the hooch for a low price. Said if he didn’t he’d take away the ranch and turn him in to the law. Then he talked about the fire in the banker’s office, the papers on the desk. He got riled up when he got to the part about my daddy findin’ them and the still, the arrest. Now he was here and just wanted everything to be the way it was before.

“The banker tried to foreclose on Dale a few weeks later without the mortgage papers that Dale had accidentally burned up. Murphy told the judge that a handshake deal was a man’s sacred bond, an agreement between men of honor, a tradition as old as the Holy Bible, on and on until he ran out of breath. Well, Judge Thompkins wasn’t havin’ any of that, said a handshake might mean plenty out on the range but it wasn’t worth a bucket of spit in a court ah law, ordered Murphy to hand over the deed by the end of the day.

“So Dale kept his ranch, Lynn come home from his aunt’s place in Pampa, but the boy wasn’t the same. Just twelve years old, he’d seen what most boys don’t see about their old man 'til after they’ve been on their own for a while, that sometimes even the toughest men can look weak. After that, you never saw Lynn Newman, man or boy, without a gun. Pitiful, my daddy said.

“There’s no guns allowed in town. Been that way since before my daddy was Sheriff. He understood that Lynn had seen the truth about his father long before he was supposed to and that it broke something inside him.

“My daddy had a lotta pull in his day, lot more ‘n me for sure. He made it a rule that Lynn could carry his gun anywhere he wanted. That’s the rule today. Lynn Newman’s the only man I let carry a gun in the city limits but the deal is, it ain't loaded. He needs to shoot somebody, he’s gotta see me first. If it’s ok by me, I give him three bullets and tell ‘im, make 'em count.”

Les leaned back in his chair, chuckled and looked around the table. I thought that was the end of Tom’s story but then I saw a look pass from Les to Doc Harris, to Jackie, back to Sheriff Tom.

Jackie nodded and Tom rolled his shoulders, warming up, I guessed, for what was coming next.

“Folks hear Newman’s name, they screw up their faces like you put some kinda stink under their noses, call him a crank or worse. I tell you, the things you don’t know about some folks, when you find them out, can make you feel pretty small. Been lots of times I wanted to say what I know but ole Newman's right sayin’ what he does is nobody’s business.

“Eight, nine years ago I was helpin’ round up the last of some wild horses on Newman’s spread. I thought the dispatcher was kiddin’ when she told me there was six of them pasturing near Newman’s artesian well. I read someplace that there used to be millions of them from here to California. I felt bad about roundin’ them up for the BLM but I know they’re taken care of, lot of 'em adopted by folks with enough money and caring in their hearts."

Tom swallowed hard. "Mustangs, last free horses in the land, go where they want, do what they want and nobody to tell ‘em otherwise. Well...”

Doc Harris made a show of clearing his throat and blowing his nose. The rest of us became fascinated by our hands, the stained table top, and the dingy ceiling.

Tom continued, “Headin’ back after the roundup around sundown I passed by a shack, the kind where you store tools for fencin’ and such 'cause it's too far to go back to the ranch house every time you need something. But I saw it wasn’t locked. Inside I found maybe a dozen pair of old tennis shoes, plastic water bottles, a few cans of corned beef hash, the kind with a loop on the lid so you don't need a tool to open it.

“Next time I saw Newman I asked him about it. Said he’d check it out, not upset or excited, just his usual dead-eye look so I let it drop, didn’t think about it for a long time.

“Jorge and me were riding home from huntin’ one time and I told him about the shack. He fussed with his stirrup but didn’t say anything, sorta like he wasn’t interested. He turned toward the trail to his place and said, ‘A thousand miles is a long way to walk on one pair of shoes’, and he rode off. That's when I knew what the shoes and water were all about.”

I sensed there was more. The Sheriff took his time lighting another cigarillo as if considering whether or not to say more.

He took a deep drag, blew the smoke to the ceiling, then looking at me he said, “So now you might think I got Newman six ways to Sunday if I want. He’s makin’ hooch on the side and he’s helpin' out folks that ain’t supposed to be here. The Feds call it aidin’ and abettin’.

“If I was a hard ass I’d take him down for the moonshine but there ain’t a DA from here to Texarkana who gives a good goddamn about an old moonshiner. And somethin’ else. So far’s I know it ain’t against the law to give shoes to strangers even if you don’t know who they are, where they’re from or where they’re goin’.”

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a good pair of shoes.
Jorge Washington De La Cruz